The Return To Sanity

by James Doesn't Exist

  • Streaming + Download

    Includes high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more. Paying supporters also get unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app.

      name your price




This album is dedicated to Lauren Elizabeth Heavin, for kicking so much ass.


released October 2, 2011

James Doesn't Exist is a project of Nikolai Gawin. As well as writing all the music, all the instruments are played/programmed by Nikolai.

"The Return To Sanity" was recorded in September of 2011 in a basement in Illinois. All the recording and mixing was handled by Nikolai Gawin.

Album artwork by Nikolai Gawin.
Thanks to Alex Cochran for some additional vocals.
Thanks to Emil Gorgioski for the logo.

3D glasses were used in the recording of this album.



Track Name: Origin Myth
"Origin Myth"

This life is gone
Yet I cannot escape
Bring me from the edge of my madness
You cannot expect me
To live like I once did
I'm sick of waiting of waiting
For my savior

Eyes around me

Watching me inside my own eyes
Just let me breathe
This is the irony of the creation of all we have

Eyes shutting down
Listen now
To my words
And live again
I am insane
Am I ready
To face the light
I say I am a king
What I really mean
Is that I cannot decide
On what to be

You forced me into this
You God damn whore
I wasn't ready to decide

I can't process what I need to understand of life these days

I can't process what I need to understand of life these days
Complications all around me
Never mind the names

I saved you
The last time
You broke the edge
All I ask in return
Just use your fucking legs
Track Name: The Foundation Of Sorts
"The Foundation Of Sorts"

We Can
Not face the end of existence
With these despondent chains
We had our one chance
To break free

I won't say goodbye
To a traitor
You raised me as your own
And left me evil

Come and rip out of your skin
It only holds you back

Then just sew it up

Everyone is judging me
They follow with their eyes
They think they're clever
Those fucking fools
Trying to outsmart me

My inclination
My horrid bias
If only you could see
Through my mind

It leaves us done and bloody
Resisting it
We ain't your fucking buddies
We're fucking this shit up
Track Name: Anarchy Evolution
"Anarchy Evolution"

The fallen and the bloody
Are at my hands
I am not what they need
Die at my hands

Praise this world
For its splendor
We fucking found what I've wished for

I don't need a fucking break
From the game
I just need to stay in first place

This is hard to comprehend
I can't understand

I Fucking Love Toast

It's just corrupt and ruined
Find something else to poison
Do this for me
Track Name: Enmity Exists
"Enmity Exists"

I lived to see the day
Where all my friends are dead
Victims of suicide
Liquor and Sudafed
It's time to fuck your face off
We are the best at what we do
So here's one from me to you

Stuck in a rut of normalcy
I fucking need it
Why don't you follow me
Down the fucking hole

I've got madness in my brain

This is but a symptom of the disease of man
I won't be a victim, I'll do the best I can
What's wrong for now
Tell me what's wrong

Truth misplaced

My time is of now
I will not succumb to greed
Believe me
I mean no wrong
It's just what I've become

Look for the signs
Look for the signs I left
In your own life
In your own life